I've been cleaning out lately. I am mortified at the things that I have held on to and squirrelled away. 35 mm cameras that I have no intention of ever using...some "family heirlooms" that will mean little to anyone but me.

One thing that I put away for a "special occasion" was a jar of home-made blackberry jam from my sister-in-law. The blackberries were picked right here on the farm and everything - that was a year ago. I know because it is less than a month until blackberries will be ready to pick again. It was on a shelf, pushed back. I wanted it for home-made bread/toast, not some peanut butter sandwich.

I found it the other day and thought, "Well, this will be good, but what is that dribble down the side?" The dribble down the side was blackberry juice. The jar's seal was broken and an entire jar of HOME-MADE BLACKBERRY JAM was wasted. That is a travesty - an awful shame.

What is even worse is opportunity and time given to me that I have wasted by not seizing the opportunity. Any resource that I do not use is squandered, be it time, energy, material possessions. Each person is given just a number of days here on this earth and what have I done with mine?

I will be 42 on my next birthday. I feel as though I have lived a lifetime yet really accomplished nothing. What have I done for Papa that will not be destroyed by the testing of fire? Jesus, live this life as I have proven that I don't know how.