hmm....

Well, as usual, I have good intentions but intentions don't write words or share my life.

So.  I've started different entries, but I never completed them and they sit in the draft.  They were mainly ranty or grumbly not really encouraging you or honoring to God.  Primarily serving my self righteousness.

Even when I point out good things others should do, it's wrong.

Did you know it's the Holy Spirit's job to convict a soul, not your and certainly not mine.  That is what makes me a hypocrite - taking the position of someone else.

And boy, oh boy!! he knows how to do that very well.

The other morning, see, it happened like this...

I have an old coffee pot - a bunn-0-matic for home.  It's quick and hot.  Mine is old enough though that the heat has hurt the plastic and caused it to become brittle and crack causing it to leak.  Well the day before Jim saw me pouring in a partial pot of water which he swears causes it to overflow.

I woke up and said I have to change out the coffee pots because this one is leaking.  I took a twenty minute teaching on why to never pour a partial pot of water.  It was 6am and I hadn't had my coffee.  I informed him I wasn't stupid and he didn't need to beat me up over it, but that he could trust me because I had already knew what was wrong with it.

So I had to set it back up and show him.

He left for the day with out even saying goodbye.

I was at work grumbling to myself about his self righteousness.

To top that off, it was the first day of a missions trip for a local church's youth group.  They are in an area where people are mislead.  So the comments were very rough concerning people of the receiving community.

All I saw around me was judgement and here it is.  This is where God works on my heart.  He asks: "And you?"

I started seeing all the ways that I was a critical person - a hypocritical person.  Someone who wanted people to act the way that I wanted them to act, not necessarily the way God wanted them to act.

It was such a struggle in my spirit that I hurt that night by the time I got home from work.

Pray for me that I would sell out for God and worry about building his kingdom, not my own.